I realize that sometimes my best friends are books. They are always there when you need them, they never argue with you, you can pick which one you are in the mood for and they never judge or discriminate. But then, I realized that although a book can be anything you need it to be at the time, a true best friend (in the physical sense) is something never to be taken for granted.
This last year I have experienced a great loss in regards to a friend. She was my best friend for seventeen years. I met her at a nail salon and held her one month old son so she could finish getting her pedicure. We bonded that day and were immediately thrust into the throws of a beautiful friendship. Our children grew up together. We cried and laughed at the silliest and most tragic of moments in our lives. During those early years of being a mother, I don’t know that I would have made it through without her. I remember us calling each other in the morning just to see how much sleep we might have gotten the night before. You would have thought that when our children finally slept through the night that first time, that we had achieved maximum mothering greatness. We shared everything, even right down to knowing exactly how many times our husbands had wanted sex that week and how we had just barely managed to make macaroni and cheese for dinner. We even went through her divorce together where she cried, laying her head in my lap, my jeans soaked from from her tears.
We cried happy tears and sad tears all throughout those seventeen years. We went to each others houses in our pajamas and watched “Days of Our Lives” at least twice a week. One time, we even went down the yellow slip and slide in our pajamas with the kids, just because. I remember everything, every moment that was hard and every moment that was good. And right up until the last few years of our friendship, I believed we would grow old together.
What brought me to these reminiscent thoughts were a realization that I no longer have that. My husband and I were watching Bride Wars last night and he said, “Don’t you wish you had a friend like that?” What I came to find out later was he was being sarcastic and asking if I wanted a crazy friendship like the war the ensued in the movie. What I thought he was asking is if I wanted a friendship that lasted through all the hardest things life can put in your way. My reply to him was; “I did.” He didn’t quite know how to respond to that.
I am deeply saddened by the ending of our friendship. We had one of those truly unique friendships that people admire and yearn for. At this point, I am just grateful to have shared that with her and realize this one very true statement.
“Friends may come and go, some stay forever and some don’t and some just stay for the time they are needed.”
We truly needed each other those seventeen years and I will treasure most of them. At this point in my life I have lots of really great friends and family. But I will say this, if you have that kind of friendship, hang on to it for as long as it’s healthy for you both to do so. If I am ever so lucky as to find a friendship like that again, I will have been truly blessed.
So now, since books are my bff’s right now, I am truly envious of a fictional friendship. I want Charley Davidson’s and Cookie Kowalski’s friendship from the First Grave on the Right series. Their sarcasm and banter and absolute unconditional love for each other is beyond any other book friendship that I have read thus far. Not to mention that the books are funny and dark and yeah the son of Satan in the book is pretty hot too. So although this post was meant to reflect on a much loved friendship, here is a series that is so worth reading. The author, Darynda Jones, is releasing her eleventh and final installment in the series in January so if you binge read now, you will be ready for the finale by then. Here is a link to the first book. Go get yourself a new book best friend!
Buy it now:First Grave on the Right